History of Science 170 Blog Post #5
Appreciating Our Caregivers
By Nathan Grant
Providing care for someone with an illness or disability can be challenging. According to the field of anthropology, caregiving may be perceived as a form of gift exchange in which caregivers provide assistance and support to care recipients who reciprocate through expressions of love and appreciation. However, how do you provide care for someone who cannot show their appreciation? How do you provide care for someone who hurts you?
Family caregivers may assist with daily living activities, including meal preparation, bathing, and toileting. These responsibilities can be difficult, unpleasant, and time-consuming. While many people with illnesses and disabilities are able to express appreciation for their caregivers, it is important to acknowledge that there are many others who cannot. People who have limiting or severe health conditions are often unable to express appreciation for the care they receive.
The relationship between Donald Gray Triplett and his parents raises questions about the nature of caregiving. Triplett was the first person ever diagnosed with autism. As child psychiatrist Leo Kanner explained in his 1943 case report about Triplett’s childhood, Triplett often had “temper tantrums during which he was destructive” (218). To keep her son calm, Triplett’s mother had to continually comfort and supervise him. She also had to assist and encourage her son to eat, wash, and dress himself (Kanner 1943, 221). While Triplett’s parents provided a lot of care and assistance, Triplett’s father said that Triplett “never seemed glad to see [his] father or mother. He seemed almost to draw into his shell and live within himself” (Kanner 1943, 218). Kanner’s case report suggests that Triplett preferred to keep to himself and live in his own world. Although Triplett’s parents made efforts to help him, it seems like Triplett rarely acknowledged his parents and the care they provided.
The challenges continue into adulthood. Journalists John Donvan and Caren Zucker wrote “Autism’s First Child” in 2010 to capture Triplett’s experiences as an adult. In their article, Donvan and Zucker asked Triplett how he felt after his mother passed away from congestive heart failure in 1985. As Triplett explained, “It was rather expected. I wasn’t really downhearted or weeping or anything like that” (Donvan and Zucker 2010). When asked why, Triplett explained that he “just doesn’t react. Different people react differently to situations like that” (Donvan and Zucker 2010). When Triplett’s father passed away in a car accident in 1980, Triplett said that he was shocked but also did not cry. Triplett did say, however, that he misses both of his parents.
While people may react to death in different ways, Triplett’s reaction gives us much to think about. Triplett’s parents took care of him for 52 years (Donvan and Zucker 2010). They visited many specialists to find help for their son. They provided continuous care and assistance with daily living activities. While Triplett may not have been able to reflect emotionally on his parents’ death, Triplett’s response does not seem to quite match the persistent amount of care his parents provided. Although Triplett’s condition likely affected his behavior, how does one provide care for so many years but receive little emotional recognition and appreciation in return?
My mother's experiences as a caregiver are similar to Triplett's parents'. My mother has struggled to provide care for my twin brother Nik, who has a rare genetic condition called Mucopolysaccharidosis (MPS) II. Due to his condition, Nik needs continual care and assistance with daily living activities. My mother has provided care for Nik for 22 years.
Over the past few years, Nik has become very aggressive. He tries to pull our hair and bite us. He usually becomes aggressive to communicate that he is sick. However, recently my brother has become aggressive at times when there are no clear underlying causes.
While there are many times when my brother smiles and gives us hugs, his aggression can overshadow the good times. My mother lives in continual fear of my brother’s behavior. While my mother is Nik’s primary caregiver, Nik’s aggression makes it extremely difficult to provide care for him. Nik does not show that he appreciates the care our mother provides. In fact, his aggression can make it seem like he does not want to be near us.
The stories from my family and Triplett’s family show that caregiving is not always a fair gift exchange. How do you keep providing care for someone who cannot tell or show you that they want it? How do you provide care for someone who tries to hurt you? While I do not think there are clear answers to these questions, I think the stories from my family and Triplett's family show that parents provide care because their children need it. Parents provide care because of their deep and profound love for their children. This is the incredible power of our caregivers.
Caregiving means providing support and assistance without giving up. Caregiving means continually being there for someone no matter what. Caregivers, while you may not immediately see that your actions are appreciated, know that you make such a huge difference in our world.
Thank you, caregivers, for all that you do.
Appreciating Our Caregivers
By Nathan Grant
Providing care for someone with an illness or disability can be challenging. According to the field of anthropology, caregiving may be perceived as a form of gift exchange in which caregivers provide assistance and support to care recipients who reciprocate through expressions of love and appreciation. However, how do you provide care for someone who cannot show their appreciation? How do you provide care for someone who hurts you?
Family caregivers may assist with daily living activities, including meal preparation, bathing, and toileting. These responsibilities can be difficult, unpleasant, and time-consuming. While many people with illnesses and disabilities are able to express appreciation for their caregivers, it is important to acknowledge that there are many others who cannot. People who have limiting or severe health conditions are often unable to express appreciation for the care they receive.
The relationship between Donald Gray Triplett and his parents raises questions about the nature of caregiving. Triplett was the first person ever diagnosed with autism. As child psychiatrist Leo Kanner explained in his 1943 case report about Triplett’s childhood, Triplett often had “temper tantrums during which he was destructive” (218). To keep her son calm, Triplett’s mother had to continually comfort and supervise him. She also had to assist and encourage her son to eat, wash, and dress himself (Kanner 1943, 221). While Triplett’s parents provided a lot of care and assistance, Triplett’s father said that Triplett “never seemed glad to see [his] father or mother. He seemed almost to draw into his shell and live within himself” (Kanner 1943, 218). Kanner’s case report suggests that Triplett preferred to keep to himself and live in his own world. Although Triplett’s parents made efforts to help him, it seems like Triplett rarely acknowledged his parents and the care they provided.
The challenges continue into adulthood. Journalists John Donvan and Caren Zucker wrote “Autism’s First Child” in 2010 to capture Triplett’s experiences as an adult. In their article, Donvan and Zucker asked Triplett how he felt after his mother passed away from congestive heart failure in 1985. As Triplett explained, “It was rather expected. I wasn’t really downhearted or weeping or anything like that” (Donvan and Zucker 2010). When asked why, Triplett explained that he “just doesn’t react. Different people react differently to situations like that” (Donvan and Zucker 2010). When Triplett’s father passed away in a car accident in 1980, Triplett said that he was shocked but also did not cry. Triplett did say, however, that he misses both of his parents.
While people may react to death in different ways, Triplett’s reaction gives us much to think about. Triplett’s parents took care of him for 52 years (Donvan and Zucker 2010). They visited many specialists to find help for their son. They provided continuous care and assistance with daily living activities. While Triplett may not have been able to reflect emotionally on his parents’ death, Triplett’s response does not seem to quite match the persistent amount of care his parents provided. Although Triplett’s condition likely affected his behavior, how does one provide care for so many years but receive little emotional recognition and appreciation in return?
My mother's experiences as a caregiver are similar to Triplett's parents'. My mother has struggled to provide care for my twin brother Nik, who has a rare genetic condition called Mucopolysaccharidosis (MPS) II. Due to his condition, Nik needs continual care and assistance with daily living activities. My mother has provided care for Nik for 22 years.
Over the past few years, Nik has become very aggressive. He tries to pull our hair and bite us. He usually becomes aggressive to communicate that he is sick. However, recently my brother has become aggressive at times when there are no clear underlying causes.
While there are many times when my brother smiles and gives us hugs, his aggression can overshadow the good times. My mother lives in continual fear of my brother’s behavior. While my mother is Nik’s primary caregiver, Nik’s aggression makes it extremely difficult to provide care for him. Nik does not show that he appreciates the care our mother provides. In fact, his aggression can make it seem like he does not want to be near us.
The stories from my family and Triplett’s family show that caregiving is not always a fair gift exchange. How do you keep providing care for someone who cannot tell or show you that they want it? How do you provide care for someone who tries to hurt you? While I do not think there are clear answers to these questions, I think the stories from my family and Triplett's family show that parents provide care because their children need it. Parents provide care because of their deep and profound love for their children. This is the incredible power of our caregivers.
Caregiving means providing support and assistance without giving up. Caregiving means continually being there for someone no matter what. Caregivers, while you may not immediately see that your actions are appreciated, know that you make such a huge difference in our world.
Thank you, caregivers, for all that you do.
References:
Donvan, John and Caren Zucker. “Autism’s First Child.” The Atlantic, August 30, 2010, https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/10/autisms-first-child/308227/.
Kanner, Leo. “Autistic Disturbances of Affective Contact.” Nervous Child 2 (1943): 217-50.
Click here to return back to the History of Science 170 Blog home page
Siblings with a Mission is a non-profit, international organization established to serve and support siblings of individuals with complex health conditions and developmental disabilities. All images are found on Google images and are solely used for educational purposes. The stories and advice provided by Siblings with a Mission are not to be replaced by professional advice and counseling but to be considered as an additional source of support.
