
"Smile Back,"
By Analia Rodriguez, Chairman of the Down Syndrome Group
Everybody gets stared at. Whether you are beautiful or in your awkward stage (I know a lot about that one), you are looked at. But no one knows being looked at like our friends with special needs. If it is with adoring eyes – like mine, ignorant eyes – like so many, or intrigued eyes – like children; our friends take the cake for drawing attention.
I have different responses to different people staring at my family. Sometimes I get defensive when someone just stares at Eli. I give them the “do you have a problem” look, and then I have to remind myself that many people have never had the experience of meeting someone like my brother. With children, a lot of times they never get the chance to see my smiling back at them; their mother usually whisks them away whispering, “It is not nice to stare at ‘people like that.'” And sometimes I am the one staring at the adorable baby with Down syndrome in the cart down the aisle.
There are times when I feel people staring and I forget for a moment that Eli is different. I see people watching us cross the street at the grocery store and think, “What is going on?” Then I remember, we parked in handicap so Eli doesn’t have to walk as far, because it’s hard for him, because he has Down syndrome.
Sunday school was always a struggle. My sister and I used to take turns helping Eli in class. The kids in the classes were always super nice, but every Sunday we never failed to get the question, “What’s wrong with him?” We learned to give the answer they would understand, “Nothing is wrong with him, sometimes he just takes a little longer to do things or he needs a little help.” After that they would usually go back to coloring or eating their snack, just occasionally looking back over to see what we were doing.
I think my perspective on people has changed. I don’t see ignorant people staring at us. I see people that I will reach one day. One day soon. People are changing; attitudes are changing. I think other people like me, the siblings, need to be on the front lines of this change. I think we can change someone’s mind just by being gracious and nice to someone who is staring at us. When you look at someone on the street, not even in an intrusive way, the way that person reacts determines your view of their personality. If everyone decided to smile back at the person looking at them, outlooks and views would change. Even if you don’t have a sibling with special needs, smile back. Smiling helps you stay in a good mood, and it also makes other people happier. When someone smiles at you, you feel obligated to smile back, and it changes your attitude. So, smile back, no matter what you are thinking.
To read more of Analia's stories, visit the Down Syndrome Story Column here. You can also visit Analia's blog for additional stories here.
Siblings with a Mission is an international organization established to serve and support siblings of individuals with special needs. All images are found on Google images and are solely used for education purposes. The stories and advice provided by Siblings with a Mission are not to be replaced by professional advice and counseling but to be considered as an additional source of support.
By Analia Rodriguez, Chairman of the Down Syndrome Group
Everybody gets stared at. Whether you are beautiful or in your awkward stage (I know a lot about that one), you are looked at. But no one knows being looked at like our friends with special needs. If it is with adoring eyes – like mine, ignorant eyes – like so many, or intrigued eyes – like children; our friends take the cake for drawing attention.
I have different responses to different people staring at my family. Sometimes I get defensive when someone just stares at Eli. I give them the “do you have a problem” look, and then I have to remind myself that many people have never had the experience of meeting someone like my brother. With children, a lot of times they never get the chance to see my smiling back at them; their mother usually whisks them away whispering, “It is not nice to stare at ‘people like that.'” And sometimes I am the one staring at the adorable baby with Down syndrome in the cart down the aisle.
There are times when I feel people staring and I forget for a moment that Eli is different. I see people watching us cross the street at the grocery store and think, “What is going on?” Then I remember, we parked in handicap so Eli doesn’t have to walk as far, because it’s hard for him, because he has Down syndrome.
Sunday school was always a struggle. My sister and I used to take turns helping Eli in class. The kids in the classes were always super nice, but every Sunday we never failed to get the question, “What’s wrong with him?” We learned to give the answer they would understand, “Nothing is wrong with him, sometimes he just takes a little longer to do things or he needs a little help.” After that they would usually go back to coloring or eating their snack, just occasionally looking back over to see what we were doing.
I think my perspective on people has changed. I don’t see ignorant people staring at us. I see people that I will reach one day. One day soon. People are changing; attitudes are changing. I think other people like me, the siblings, need to be on the front lines of this change. I think we can change someone’s mind just by being gracious and nice to someone who is staring at us. When you look at someone on the street, not even in an intrusive way, the way that person reacts determines your view of their personality. If everyone decided to smile back at the person looking at them, outlooks and views would change. Even if you don’t have a sibling with special needs, smile back. Smiling helps you stay in a good mood, and it also makes other people happier. When someone smiles at you, you feel obligated to smile back, and it changes your attitude. So, smile back, no matter what you are thinking.
To read more of Analia's stories, visit the Down Syndrome Story Column here. You can also visit Analia's blog for additional stories here.
Siblings with a Mission is an international organization established to serve and support siblings of individuals with special needs. All images are found on Google images and are solely used for education purposes. The stories and advice provided by Siblings with a Mission are not to be replaced by professional advice and counseling but to be considered as an additional source of support.